A Rake's Progress through Keele

A Journal of, and Practical Guide to, University Life as a Dandy

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Chap Olympiad 2007

The Chap Olympics provided me with a perfect opportunity to update this dormant blog, especially as I emerged as this year's champion and winner of the coveted Golden Cravat.

The day begin with the filming of the sketch in which the Geovictwardian's founder (or more accurately, revealer) Albion challenges the arch-cad Atters "on the plains of Troy, or is it the playing fields of Eton?", a scene sadly cut from the final take of the Hendrick's video (that can be found here: http://www.urbanjunkies.com/).

atters v albion

This was followed by the magnificent Opening Ceremony. This began with a lap around Bedford Square Gardens behind last year's champion - Fruity - carrying the Union Flag, followed by the lighting of the Olympic Pipe (an oversized briar filled with potent Navy Shag) which was passed to each competitor, and finally the placement of the ceremonial Olympic Pipe next to a bottle of Hendrick's on a pedestal by the organiser, Gustav Temple. After this, the Geovictwardians erected the base camp, before heading the refreshment tents to collect our share of the plentiful free G&T provided by Hendrick's.

geovictwardian base

For the Geovictwardians, the day's events commenced with the Martini Relay. For this, each member of the team had to stroll (running and perspiring are penalised by the judge as "ungentlemanly" activities) to a table containing the ingredients for a Hendrick's martini. Each must then carry out his role (first person does ice; the next does the vermouth; the third adds the Hendrick's Gin; and the fourth pours it into the glass, adds an olive, then presents it to the judge). Unfortunately the judge, Fruity, took a dislike to our martini (perhaps a result of the bribe openly offered to him by the team before ours). This, however, left more martini for me - about which I can hardly complain.

martini relay1

martini relay2

martini relay3

Immediately after completing the Martini relay, the Geovictwardian team was recalled for the Pipe Relay. In this iconicly anarcho-dandyist relay, our team had to pass a briar pipe from the start line to a team member reclining in a chair, then to the last team member (reading a copy of the Telegraph and stationed by an emergency G&T ) who must carry it across the finishing tape while keeping it still lit. Albion, our second team member, became distracted in the stylish manner that is so characteristic of Geovictwardians, by engaging in a cane duel with an opposing Chap midway down the track!

pipe relay1

pipe relay2

My beloved Kat and I also took part in the Bounder's Race. This race required me to saunter up to Kat, then deliver an outrageous (yet flirtatious) comment, resulting in a loud slap followed by a wry small. However, as Geovictwardians, we felt further flair needed to be added to our performance - so I then proceeded to doff my tricorne to, and flirt with, the next lady in line, after which Kat chased me down the length of the course striking me with her gloves. This attracted a most pleasing audience reaction, with an audible and touching chorus of "ah" resulting from our make up embrace after the race had concluded. Atters, however, inevitably triumphed.

me and kat

Geovictwardians also took part in several other events, including the Three-Legged Trouser Limbo, Steeplechase, and (periwig) Curling. The final event - the Free-style Dash (in which competitors must bring their own non-motorised transport) saw the conclusion of the mighty duel between Atters and Albion. Albion was mounted on his trusty hobby-dragon steed "Snap", while Atters used various forms of transport - including a go-kart that failed to start, and a stretcher carried by a harem of attractive ladies. Albion triumphed over Atters, as Atters became distracted by a burlesque streaker and never crossed the finish line.

Albion dash

At the end of the day, the awards ceremony to award the coveted Gold, Silver, and Bronze cravats, took place. To my suprise and great excitement I, Frisax, was awarded the Gold Cravat for overall winner. After recieving the Gold Cravat, I retired to the Museum Tavern with a number of Chaps and New Sheridanites.



Most photographs courtesy of Fiona Campbell, some from the Sheridan Club's FlickR.


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